For all she had to say. Can you explain what that means for you? This eulogy from William Sloane Coffin following the death of his son offers words of wisdom and hope for those struggling with the tragedy in Connecticut. When a person dies, there are many things that can be said, and there is at least one thing that should never be said. Because there are no rankling unanswered questions, and because Alex and I simply adored each other, the wound for me is deep, but clean. The Art of Manliness participates in affiliate marketing programs, which means we get paid commissions on editorially chosen products purchased through our links. I walked a mile with Sorrow And neer a word said she; But the things I learned from her But oh, the things I learned from her When sorrow walked with me. As almost all of you know, a week ago last Monday night, driving in a terrible storm, my son Alexander who to his friends was a real day-brightener, and to his family fair as a star when only one is shining in the sky my twenty-four-year-old Alexander, who enjoyed beating his old man at every game and in every race, beat his father to the grave. But if anyone dare speak in response to this tragic accident, they could learn much from William Sloane Coffin, the American justice activist who died last year, about what not to say to someone whose heart is breaking. Transcript - William Sloane Coffin's Eulogy for Alex Ten days after his son, Alex, was killed in a car accident, Reverend William Sloane Coffin delivered this moving eulogy turned sermon, filled with deep truth and deep pain about the realities of death and the true (not trite) hope we have in God. tragic death of at least 26 Polish pilgrims, The Faraday Institute for Science and Religion, Jonathan Merritt and the ethics of "outing". And round that early-laurelled head 25 We see acuter quite By a departing light The reality of grief is the absence of God My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? The reality of grief is the solitude of pain, the feeling that your heart is in pieces, your minds a blank, that there is no joy the world can give like that it takes away. (Lord Byron). I know all the right biblical passages, including Blessed are those who mourn, and my faith is no house of rest, came from fellow reverends, a few of whom proved they knew their cards; these passages are true, I know. and what an inspiring Eulogy by William Sloane Coffin concerning his Son and his Faith. But like God herself, Scripture is not around for anyones protection, just for everyones unending support. Contributions to support this project can always be made through PayPal (david@davidcoffin.com). A different man named Alex Hamilton who was a British broadcaster used the saying in 1978. A Prayer by William Sloan Coffin Jr., 1983. There's something deep in there that involves joy and hope. January 6, 1968 Spock and Coffin Indicted For Activity Against Draft By FRED P. GRAHAM . Thanks for posting this. Q: Many of us say, "Well, you know, I've got to work hard to support my family, I don't have a lot of time," or "I don't want to seem radical," or "I don't want to cause my neighbors to suspect I'm not fully patriotic." RN: Why do you think most of the anti-war groups stopped their marches in 2004 and became quiescent compared to 2003? William Sloane Coffin, Jr. was born June 1, 1924, in New York City. ABERNETHY: Coffin became the leader of the U.S. campaign against nuclear weapons. The fact you find that puzzling makes me glad not to be in your family! When parents die, as my mother did last month, they take with them a large portion of the past. This is the fifth year of the complete ten year collection of sermons. How much suffering? How does a true Christian operate in a pluralistic world? After the death of his wife, C.S. So people are feeling sorry for themselves instead of happy for the one they believe is now in heaven. While the words of the Bible are true, grief renders them unreal. Details are given further below. As for the theological issues, I agree with William on the need for respectful silence. As the grief that once seemed unbearable begins to turn now to bearable sorrow, the truths in the "right" biblical passages are beginning, once again, to take hold: "Cast thy burden upon the Lord and He shall strengthen thee"; "Weeping may endure for the night but joy cometh in the morning"; "Lord, by thy favor thou hast made my mountain to stand strong"; "For thou hast delivered my soul from death, mine eyes from tears, and my feet from falling"; "In this world ye shall have tribulation, but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world"; "The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.". Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. William Sloane Coffin Jr., a United Church of Christ minister known globally for his peace and justice advocacy, died April 12 at his home in rural Strafford, Vermont. "The world is too dangerous for anything but truth and too small for anything but love." --- William Sloane Coffin. It is self-interest. There's something in the flight Never do we know enough to say that. The use of Gods will or God has chosen to take whatever the phrase has always made me uncomfortable. Then a miracle working preacher comes to town promising at midnight, all the dead will rise from boot hill and come back to life. As the grief that once seemed unbearable begins to turn now to bearable sorrow, the truths in the right biblical passages are beginning, once again, to take hold: Cast thy burden upon the Lord and He shall strengthen thee; Weeping may endure for the night but joy cometh in the morning; Lord, by thy favor thou hast made my mountain to stand strong; For thou hast delivered my soul from death, mine eyes from tears, and my feet from falling; In this world ye shall have tribulation, but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world; The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.. He was 81. . Yes, but at least, "My God, my God"; and the psalm only begins that way, it doesn't end that way. But like God herself, Scripture is not around for anyones protection, just for everyones unending support. The Rev. William Sloane Coffin, Jr., (born June 1, 1924, New York, New York, U.S.died April 12, 2006, Strafford, Vermont, U.S.), American clergyman and civil rights activist who achieved national prominence as the chaplain (1958-75) at Yale University, where he became a familiar figure on campus, championing civil rights and opposing the Vietnam War. By a departing light Today's Times asks the inevitable question following the tragic death of at least 26 Polish pilgrims in the French Alps: What kind of God would allow something like this to happen? It remains a heartfelt classic in homiletics. In a prideful way it would be easier to walk the valley alone, nobly, head high, instead of as we must marching as the latest recruit in the world's army of the bereaved. Even as he was trying to cooperate gracefully with the inevitability of death, he was also coaching Paul Newman to play the preacher in the film version of Marilynn Robinson's novel Gilead. For some reason, nothing so infuriates me as the incapacity of seemingly intelligent people to get it through their heads that God doesnt go around this world with his fingers on triggers, his fists around knives, his hands on steering wheels. Didnt the eagle find a fresh liver to tear in Prometheus every time it dined? When parents die, as my mother did last month, they take with them a large portion of the past. So while trite, its true: I walked a mile with Pleasure, He was ordained in the Presbyterian Church, and later received ministerial standing in the United Church of Christ. So why were they angry? Will flock to gaze the strengthless dead, I swear to you, I wouldnt be standing here were I not upheld. I know how lucky I am! And find unwithered on its curls Editors note: Ten days after his son, Alex, drove off a bridgeand was killed in a car accident, Reverend William Sloane Coffin delivered the following sermon to his congregation at Riverside Church in New York City. And Christ spent an inordinate amount of time delivering people from paralysis, insanity, leprosy, and muteness. But the things I learned from her I swear to you, I wouldn't be standing here were I not upheld. But like God herself, Scripture is not around for anyones protection, just for everyones unending support. Online shopping from a great selection at Books Store. William Sloane Coffin Jr. preached these Sunday sermons from the pulpit of the Riverside Church in New York City. This album is a collection of prayers from the end of the sermons; 1982-1983. Will was tyring to elicit thoughts about the whole concept of a god's will. The night after Alex died I was sitting in the living room of my sisters house outside of Boston, when the front door opened and in came a nice-looking, middle-aged woman, carrying about eighteen quiches. Than by a wick that stays. I know. I also know this day-brightener of a son wouldnt wish to be held close by grief (nor, for that matter, would any but the meanest of our beloved departed) and that, interestingly enough, when I mourn Alex least I see him best. Itsjust one of those things I think is worth a read by all. She chattered all the way; Want to start taking action on the content you read on AoM? Seems a good deal for him - get all the praise when things go our way but none of the blame when things go wrong due to no fault of our own. Robert Browning Hamilton. Which is not to say that there are no nature-caused deaths I can think of many right here in this parish in the five years Ive been here deaths that are untimely and slow and pain-ridden, which for that reason raise unanswerable questions, and even the specter of a Cosmic Sadist yes, even an Eternal Vivisector. I mentioned the healing flood of letters. MOYERS: Youre not supposed to outlive your children, are you? BBC 2014 The BBC is not responsible for the content of external sites. This is the fourth year of the complete ten year collection of sermons. After one year at Yale, Coffin joined the U.S. Army, in which he served until 1947, when he returned to Yale, graduating with a B.A. The post A Eulogy for Alex appeared first on The Art of Manliness. The Rev. Heres how Coffin explained how he managed to write and deliver this eulogy so soon after his sons death (from an interview with Bill Moyers): COFFIN: Well. This is the second year of the complete ten year collection of sermons. While the words of the Bible are true, grief renders them unreal. And silence sounds no worse than cheers 15 The Blessing of Grace by The Rev. Why aren't people in the streets today the way they were in the civil rights movement, the antiwar movement? Rev. But its a fact: few of us are naturally profound. The night after Alex died I was sitting in the living room of my sister's house outside of Boston, when the front door opened and in came a nice-looking, middle-aged woman, carrying about eighteen quiches. I too have thought Gods heart is the first to break. God does not spill milk. The night after Alex died I was sitting in the living room of my sisters house outside of Boston, when the front door opened and in came a nice-looking, middle-aged woman, carrying about eighteen quiches. Anonymous- I think people are grieving because they're sad to see someone go. The Rev. Practicing wholesale justice Interview with Bob Abernathy August 27, 204 The Rev. Updated February 2023. Rev. COFFIN: No. Here are additional selected citations in chronological order. William Sloane Coffin, a United Church of Christ Minister known globally for his peace and justice advocacy, died April 12, 2006, at his home in rural Strafford, Vt. In a prideful way it would be easier to walk the valley alone, nobly, head high, instead of as we must marching as the latest recruit in the worlds army of the bereaved. What can be done to turn this public support into organized opposition? So it is, and so it will be, for so it has been, time out of mind. Interview with Religion & Ethics Newsweekly. William Sloane Coffin Jr. in 1986. William Sloane Coffin challenged the nation with his passionate calls for social justice. But its a fact: few of us are naturally profound. Embed. As the . Is that so hard to understand? And ne'er a word said she; Didn't the eagle find a fresh liver to tear in Prometheus every time it dined?". God gave man dominion over the world at the beginning - and free will - and man so man has had the responsibility for his conduct since then, and for infecting all of creation with his sin. Download Sermon Scripture List(84 kb - PDF). We have to be forced down. The answers quick and keen, the honest look, the laughter, the love, . William Sloane Coffin also wrote about this in his eulogy for his son, Alex, who was killed in a car accident at age 24. How are you able to look at the world as it is and still have the capacity for feeling joyful? I said. It is self-interest. (Lord Byron). William Sloane Coffin Heart, Optimistic, Independent 64 Copy quote To show compassion for an individual without showing concern for the structures of society that make him an object of compassion is to be sentimental rather than loving. Quotes. So while trite, its true: I walked a mile with Pleasure, She chattered all the way; But left me none the wiser For all she had to say. So what is the role of the university chaplain? And of course I know, even when pain is deep, that God is good. Receive small business resources and advice about entrepreneurial info, home based business, business franchises and startup opportunities for entrepreneurs. The Rev. William Sloane Coffin's Eulogy for Alex Ten days after his son, Alex, was killed in a car accident, Reverend William Sloane Coffin delivered this sermon to his congregation at Riverside Church in New York City. When its true and painful, say it softly, None of us have the right to avert our gaze. Rev. Q: You preached that wonderful sermon after your son's death, and there were some ideas in there about what is "God's will.". This is the seventh year of the complete ten year collection of sermons. I read through this with utter esteem for the sentiments therein and Will is right to say that those who speak in response to a tragedy like this they could learn much from this eulogy, which said it all, so very very well. This brings up additional illogic in religion. We all do what we know how to do, maybe. My own consolation lies in knowing that it was not the will of God that Alex die; that when the waves closed over the sinking car, Gods heart was the first of all our hearts to break. Than by a wick that stays. He was 81.. 18 Sourced Quotes. Q: How about your own death? -- William Sloane Coffin. It seems to me for those believers who grieve, their religion brings them little more comfort than those who don't. William Sloane Coffin Jr. preached these Sunday sermons from the pulpit of the Riverside Church in New York City. Alex, as he was called, was killed in a car accident in 1983 when he was only. Coffin on defense issues from the Center for Defense Information; Read Coffin's eulogy for his son Alex; Relive the past with Rev. When sorrow walked with me. They said it was god's will, that she is in heaven now and they moved on without the tearjerking remorse many who call them true believers in a faith feel. So, I wrote the sermon about it. "William Sloan Coffin, who died yesterday at 81, was among the foremost pacifists of his generation, and set the mold for the liberal activist preacher." William Sloane Coffin Jr. preached these Sunday sermons from the pulpit of the Riverside Church in New York City. And home we brought you shoulder-high. But was he a criminal? William Sloane Coffin Jr. preached these Sunday sermons from the pulpit of the Riverside Church in New York City. While you will be able to view the content of this page in your current browser, you will not be able to get the full visual experience. And that's what hundreds of you understood so beautifully. I know how lucky I am! It is difficult to know how to theologise about a tragedy of this order without descending into cliche, trivialisation or offensiveness. First you leap, and then you grow wings." --- William Sloane Coffin. The fleet foot on the sill of shade, "A spiritual person tries less to be godly than to be deeply . The reality of grief is the absence of God "My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?" I think it will serve as a reminder of many stupid things we all have said to people who are grieving the main one probably being William Sloane Coffin Compassion, Sentimental, Individual William Sloane Coffin (2004). And read the poems. Your email address will not be published. See more stories about iPad, HBO, How-To. Do you think about that? If we (me included) could only get a fraction of a grasp between the difference between time and eternity we would cling much less to time and be closer to God's perspective. Did you perhaps mistake me for someone else?? This is the tenth year of the complete 10 year collection of sermons. I know all the right biblical passages, including Blessed are those who mourn, and my faith is no house of rest, came from fellow reverends, a few of whom proved they knew their cards; these passages are true, I know. This invaluable anthology is the first and only collection dedi Nowhere in the scripture does it say, God is car accident or God is death. God is justice and kindness, mercy, and always always love. But oh, the things I learned from her A formula, A phrase remains.but the best is lost. And the folks in Riverside Church had to know whether or not they still had a pastor. This is the seventh year of the complete ten year collection of sermons. It just happened. Unfortunately he left the building April 12th, 2006. Ive read and re-read this passage many times: I told them, It was an accident. ABERNETHY: I asked Coffin to think back on the civil rights and other protest movements he helped lead. It is truly a labor of love (a lot of labor; a lot of love) to digitally "Save Bill's Voice." Delivered from the Riverside Church pulpit over his ten years as senior minister, there were over 300 sermons in need of archiving to a digital format. Well, so I wanted them to know, they had a pastor. The world is too dangerous for anything but truth and too small for anything but love. That is what makes the valley of the shadow of death seem so incredibly dark and unending. Still there is much by way of consolation. April 12, 2006 / 7:32 PM / AP. http://dlvr.it/Ng3r8d. The one thing that should never be said when someone dies is "It is the will of God." He was ordained in the Presbyterian Church, and later received ministerial standing in the United Church of Christ. You can purchase individual prayers for $1.34 (includes processing fees). --Robert Browning Hamilton. For some reason, nothing so infuriates me as the incapacity of seemingly intelligent people to get it through their heads that God doesnt go around this world with his fingers on triggers, his fists around knives, his hands on steering wheels. Rev. I know all the right biblical passages, including Blessed are those who mourn, and my faith is no house of rest, came from fellow reverends, a few of whom proved they knew their cards; these passages are true, I know. That clarifies the sight Runners whom renown outran But like God herself, Scripture is not around for anyone's protection, just for everyone's unending support. Which is not to say that there are no nature-caused deaths I can think of many right here in this parish in the five years Ive been here deaths that are untimely and slow and pain-ridden, which for that reason raise unanswerable questions, and even the specter of a Cosmic Sadist yes, even an Eternal Vivisector. I was impressed by the Amish last year when that young girl was killed. Lewis wrote, "They say 'the coward dies many times'; so does the beloved. Alex. Ill say you dont, lady! I said. But I do not approve. _______________ Reprinted with permission of theWilliam Sloane Coffin Sermon Archive Project. Coffin delivered his sermon "Eulogy for Alex" at Riversid e Church. If you had a pastoral visit with the president, what would you say? Coffin questioned authority throughout his career, using civil . I mentioned the healing flood of letters. William Sloane Coffin Jr. preached these Sunday sermons from the pulpit of the Riverside Church in New York City. SERMON: Alex's Death, by William Sloane Coffin, Jr. Posted on October 6, 2013. And thats what hundreds of you understood so beautifully. RN: What do you think the churches and the National Council of Churches should be doing that they are not now doing regarding the war-occupation? And finally I know that when Alex beat me to the grave, the finish line was not Boston Harbor in the middle of the night. After the tsunami, some Moslem clerics said it was god's punishment for their sins. And I played all the hymns. You gave me what God gives all of us minimum protection, maximum support. I was first introduced to this sermon years agoin a college communications course, and I have thought of it with surprising regularityever since. The reality of grief is the solitude of pain, the feeling that your heart is in pieces, your mind's a blank, that "there is no joy the world can give like that it takes away." I also know this day-brightener of a son wouldn't wish to be held close by grief (nor, for that matter, would any but the meanest of our beloved departed) and that, interestingly enough, when I mourn Alex least I see him best. This is beautiful!!! As his younger brother put it simply, standing at the head of the casket at the Boston funeral, "You blew it, buddy. William Sloane Coffin Jr., chaplain of Yale University, were indicted today on charges of conspiring to counsel young men to violate the draft laws. As his younger brother put it simply, standing at the head of the casket at the Boston funeral, You blew it, buddy. But . But it's a fact: few of us are naturally profound. I was first introduced to this sermon years ago in a college communications course, and I have thought of it with surprising regularity ever since. All rights reserved. Podcast #862: Heal the Body With Extended Fasting Podcast #761: How Testosterone Makes Men, Men How Saunas Can Help Save Your Body, Mind, and Spirit Podcast #852: The Brain Energy Theory of Mental Illness Individual prayers and sermons can be purchased by clicking the cart icon next to each prayer or sermon title. #Firsts #Leap #Wings. Hello Select your address If the order gets mixed up, thats misery. You blew it." So I shall so let us all seek consolation in that love which never dies, and find peace in the dazzling grace that always is. And neer a word said she; I am not resigned to the shutting away of loving hearts in the cold ground. Coffin's son, Alex, tragic death in an automobile accident. So why the grief, self pity? And then, Im a preacher. Not because our diverse readership will agree with all of its theological underpinnings, but because I think it offers wise advice on what to say (and not say) when someone dies tragically, a poignant window on the human experience, and a lesson in the art of effective rhetoric(hence why we were discussing it in a communications class). Challenged the nation with his passionate calls for social justice content you read on AoM of sermons I learned her... Most of the Riverside Church in New York City on AoM phrase has always made me.! Different man named Alex Hamilton who was a British broadcaster used the saying in 1978 `` it is difficult know! And of course I know, even when pain is deep, that God is good loving. Authority throughout his career, using civil leader of the shadow of death seem so incredibly dark and.... 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